YES, PRIME MINISTER

Dear Prime Ministerji,

Only an apology will set my mind at rest, Sir.

As one among the millions of "aam aadmis" you have chosen to represent and uplift, I all along had my faith in what pundits have come to call "Manmohanomics", and had dutifully, every year, listened/watched the budget broadcasts and trusted the learned opinions of the "expert panel" that it was all economic tightrope-walking and that it was not going to affect the "aam aadmi". Though the post-budget blues had hit me too I thought, I was by and large consoled by the studied opinions of the experts.

But recently my faith was shaken, nay hijacked, by the  media, who claimed in their expose' that each of us "aam aadmis" had been "robbed" to the tune of a few thousand rupees, totalling a grand tidy sum, in what has now come to be labelled the 2G Scam. For an instant I lost my faith in your firm grasp of economics.

However, I when I heard Sibalji, I was relieved and heaved a great sigh. Frankly, I can count maybe to 25,000 or, at a pinch to 50,000, but arithmetic and figures have never been my strong points. (You should have been there when I went to the Treasury to collect my pension benefits and cursed myself for not attending to my maths classes, so I could tally up the bundle of notes handed to be by the teller!) Believe me, I had my own difficulties with the figures presented by your mInister Mr Sibal. But I believe in his figures fully and totally, as apparently you have, the moment you noticed that you must lay the facts and figures before your voters (sorry, no need to stand on technicalities; we ARE your voters, whether we voted for you or not), authorized him to do so. Adroit lawyer that he is, my feeling is that he is the greatest arithmatician since Aryabhata and Einstein. Kudos to his brilliant presentation, our minds have been cleared of any media-generated misconceptions. How cavalierly of us 'proletarians' to think that you never had our good in your heart. I thank Sibal for reminding us that the 2G procedure had insured the current low telecom rates enjoyed by us all.

On second thoughts, I guess I could view with admiration your perspicacity and economic sense when you silently advocated  holding the price of spectrum at the 2001 levels. In our country when inflation is affecting everything else, it was indeed a laudatory step to try and rein in the price of something as important as radio spectrum, which I understand is critical to the development and progress of the country. You are fortunate to have at least two ministers in your cabinet who are conscious of the need to put a bridle on prices. One, of course, is Mr Raja. The other is Mr Deora, our petroleum minister, who takes a lot of flack unflinchingly. But everybody conveniently forgets the two or three times he cut the price of aviation fuel, which I think now is about Rs 45 plus a litre. Again, a gesture in the right direction, I think. The car is the rich man's toy; let us not forget that there are millions of "aam aadmis" flying to the Gulf and elsewhere in search of a job, who I am sure will be benefitted by the lower price of jet fuel.

I am hoping that with ministers like them and Mr Sibal, it wont be long before you could arrest the rocketing price of commodities and foodstuffs. Perhaps you should think of re-inducting Mr Raja into the Food ministry; it is the right thing to do as the humble man who just followed your economic line had to go out for no fault of his. Do consider seriously giving him the charge of the food ministry. Surely his firm-handed efforts should in no time send the prices, including those of onions, crashing to the 2001 levels.

Sir, our apologies to you for suspecting your wisdom as regards the "larger interests" of the nation. I am sure just as our minds have been calmed, you too must be experiencing a relief beyond compare now that you have set the record straight. Now at this peak of personal satisfaction that you have served the nation and its interests to the best of your ability, you must give up this thankless job and retire to the peace of some nearby sanctuary. But before you do that, will it be too much to ask you to put in place some legislation so that us poor "aaam aadmis" would be eligible for some refunds once the government implements the 2001 priceline for foodstuffs, kersosene, cooking gas, petrol and such stuff. I am sure your brilliant 'economic' mind could devise some way of doing that.

I cant hold my laughter when I think of all those moneyed fools who spent about five or six times the original price to buy off the spectrum from the original buyers. If they were keen, they need have only paid a marginal profit of a per cent or two. To have splurged so much of money, and that too on  something as intangible as radio spectrum, shows that they were imprudent businessmen. Ah, it takes all sorts of people to make up this world; but then it should not affect us people whose consciences are clear.

On further thoughts, I have a feeling that your anti-inflationary price-holding tactics may not be for the good of the older generation at least. As things stand, "vanaprastham" does not cut much ice with the older generation--perhaps as it is not subsidized like pilgrimages,. But the prices of onions and everything else have had the salutary effect of making a large part of our population to once again discover and embrace the many attractions of a frugal living, which Gandhiji had all along advocated. As a recently retired person I could vouch for that. So maybe double-digit inflation is good, as it could be a virtual short-cut to "vanaprastha" and ultimate "moksha"!

Do sleep on that, Sir.
Once again, with apologies and salaams,
Sincerely yours,